Saturday, October 10, 2015

31 days of brave: Day 10 - in the mud

I'm just sneaking this post in before today turns into tomorrow... today has been such an exhausting, regular day. I feel like I'm coming down with a cold and my head feels fuzzy and this post feels unfinished, but here I am, showing up again. Writing again. My unfinished words - because maybe you know what this is like too... 


At the beginning of this year I wrote about how I felt God call me out into the deep waters with Him. I began by being willing to embrace my own brokenness, I heard God call me to be quiet, to go low (serve with love) and go slowly.

What happened next was walking through a season of mud.

I felt like the tide went out and instead of walking on the water, 
here I stood trudging through the mud.

Recently I started reading the book "Simply Tuesday" by Emily P Freeman (who is my favorite author right now) and she writes something in those first few pages that deeply resonates with me -
 "most of life happens, not it brightness or in darkness but in the medium light of a regular day... these regular tasks are the unlikely portals into the kingdom of God, and the goal isn't to set them aside but to recognize Christ with us in the midst of them." 

I have found this to be so true. I wanted this journey to be dramatic, to be cinematic to be a story of glorious mountain tops following life-or-death struggle.

But that's not my story.

My story is trudging through the mud of ordinary life, finding God using my everyday to slowly and gently do His work in the deep and hidden places of my soul. I have found that sometimes the greatest miracle God is working in me is in the middle of my mundane.

I think that this is important because so many of us are struggling in the middle of our everyday. We are grinding through our in-between seasons and ordinary struggles and it's nothing epic on the surface - it's ordinary life, and yet what God is doing in it is profound.
continue reading... hedged in

I believe this now with every fiber of my being.

As I think back on this season that God brought me through it was brutal. It was quiet, it was ordinary yet it felt like my heart was breaking. It didn't make sense. It was hard to find the words for what was going on inside of me. 

I believe that God was using these seasons, these feelings, like the tide has gone out and I was standing in the mud, these ordinary struggles - this is where I was learning new habits. This is where our roots go deeper. This is where our faith gets a little stronger. This is where we learn to worship. This is where we learn to believe...

When Grayson was in the hospital I could feel the work that this season did in my soul. I could feel the roots of my faith had gone deeper. I could feel new habits of worship in the face of fear rise while I was facing fears huger than anything I'd ever known. The struggles we face in our ordinary life can seem like nothing - but hey are everything. The choices we make day to day, to live out our brave or to hide in our fear, these are the choices that shape how we handle the big moments. These are the moments that shape who we are becoming. 

Here is a song for today's post - it is one that we have been singing at church for awhile and one that I dearly love.

2 comments:

  1. This might be one of the most important posts you've done! It's so true! Thank you!

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  2. When Grayson was in the hospital I could feel the work that this season did in my soul. I could feel the roots of my faith had gone deeper. I could feel new habits of worship in the face of fear rise while I was facing fears huger than anything I'd ever known. The struggles we face in our ordinary life can seem like nothing - but hey are everything. The choices we make day to day, to live out our brave or to hide in our fear, these are the choices that shape how we handle the big moments. These are the moments that shape who we are becoming.

    So beautiful. Love this.

    ReplyDelete

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