Tuesday, January 27, 2015

Let it go


Yesterday morning I wrote a post on Instagram. I carefully thought about what I was writing, posted it and almost immediately felt deeply how inadequate my words had been. I had written about nine beautiful verses, full of hope, but focused in on one word. 

Trials. 

I struggled with the accusation that I was writing like one of those gloomy Christians. Feeling like a failure I thought about taking it down or just reducing the number of words. 

I got in my car and headed to the grocery store with all these words words words... and as I turned the radio on the song "Oceans" came on and I remembered writing about how I wanted to go DEEP with God this year. Taking steps that are bold and far out of my comfort zone. 

I felt God remind me that I can't carry the weight of perfectionism out onto the deep water. 

The reality is that this is where I am. In the middle of a long, brutal, soul-crushing trial. Knowing that trials are necessary and that even though they hurt they really are doing something good in me gives me hope. 

The reality is that anyone who puts anything out there is going to have to battle perfectionism. If we wait until our words are perfect we won't say anything at all, at least nothing bold and brave. Excellent, yes. Perfect, no.
So I'm going to keep on writing, pushing forward, getting better. Letting go of the fear of what people will think when they see my cracks and imperfections. When they spot the gaps and see my deficiencies. I just have to let it go and keep moving forward into the person that God has made me to be. More clearly, brighter, bolder. 

Redeemed. 

2 comments:

  1. And, letting go and being the person God made you to be is just what you should be...He made you, and "God said, "It is GOOD"...good - perfect - beautiful - special! That is WHO you are and who God made you to be. The rest will come - and the trials will only make you stronger and a better person for HIS plans for you!!

    As for your writing...it is beautiful, thought-provoking and I love to read what you write!

    Thank you for sharing!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I love this; such beautiful words and I can relate as well. <3

    ReplyDelete

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