Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Summer Survival: when things don't go as planned

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Summer Survival
Ever since our first day of summer vacation we've been battling sickness in one form or another. Emma has had a cough, Katie-Abigail broke out with a poison ivy rash - again and she is severely allergic). Josiah caught Emma's cough and ran a low grade fever all weekend, Emma woke up Monday morning throwing up all over the living room carpet. I took Josiah to his doctor yesterday because I was worried about his cough. The strep test came back positive and he's on antibiotics today.

This morning I woke up feeling like I'd been hit by a truck and then it backed up and ran over my head again for extra measure. I was laying in bed this morning trying to get up for the day feeling frustrated. I wanted this summer to be super-organized and ultra-productive but it hasn't been either of those things so far. 

I feel like so far this summer has been something of a train wreck, with day on top of day that are more stressful than sweet. I've been overwhelmed and generally resentful of being constantly interrupted and inconvenienced - which is selfish of me, but there it is - I want to do what I want to do and I want it to be amazing and perfect. When the kids make it hard, when the baby starts crying, the bigger kids start fighting and all I want to do is have an uninterrupted conversation or a trip to the grocery store that doesn't bring me to close to tears. It's hard.

So as I was getting my head together this morning a verse came to mind, which I realized is a verse that I studied during the last semester of small group from the James Bible Study by Beth Moore :

Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God promised to those who love him. James 1:12 ESV 

Steadfast means fixed, immovable, unchanging, steady, faithful and constant - this morning it means not giving up and letting the TV stay on all day, even though I don't feel well. It means not giving in to self-pity. It means taking a moment to step back and remember that even though the weight of these days sometimes feels unbearable and grate of my kid's neediness and immaturity feels like it will wear me down to the bone when I respond to them and the trial of sick kids, a sore throat and a massive pressure headache with grace God will bless me. I don't know exactly what this text means by "crown of life" it reminds me of other verses that talk about the crown God will give us on the last day and heavenly rewards but this verse also reminds me of those verses in Isaiah (especially in chapters 54-66 ) that talk about how God takes our sorrow and our ashes and turns them into beauty and glory and a crown, and God's glory and His delight in us and presence with us adorns our lives like a crown.

And let steadfastness have it's full effect that you may be mature... James 1:3

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5 comments:

  1. Real life in a broken Creation...praying for you.
    Love,
    Mum

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  2. I hope that you all feel better soon. Some of the best summers that I can remember, were slow paced and non-eventful, and I try to remember that when things don't go according to plan. I bet it won't do much harm if the tv needs to be on all day, if it helps you to get rest, and get healthier sooner. I always find that the kids get sick as soon as holidays start, I think it's their bodies finally relaxing the pace a bit! So Frustrating! Things usually settle into the summer routine in week 2 for us. Good Luck!

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    1. Thank you so much Katie. I find it takes a couple weeks to settle into a routine, I just don't remember all of the kids getting sick right away! It's very frustrating - but not the end of the world! Thanks so much for leaving the encouraging comment. That means a lot to me.

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  3. I totally hear you! You sound just like me the other day. I will pray all your kido's get over the sicknesses soon so you can enjoy your summer, relax and get to do some of the activities you have planned. Our church just did that SAME study. I wasn't able to go this past time, but I got a book and have been going through it. My mom and I want to do it together soon.

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